Thursday, September 22, 2011

BMXtremely and the Traveling Fowls

Having spent a lot of time at skateparks, riding skateboards, I often had words with the BMX kids who frequented them. The pegs found on freestyle bikes ruin coping (that slick stuff that lines the bowls and the apex of ramps for those who don't skate), especially if the coping is concrete. Bikers take up more space too, and regularly hang out in packs at one side of the park where there may or may not be skateable terrain, blocking other users. Bikes also travel much faster than skateboards, and they have components on them that can cause bodily harm to unsuspecting old guys working their way up a snake run.

One day that old guy was me. I had just gotten there and started pushing around when one of the BMX'ers had just finished riding a line in the adjacent bowl and then aired out, into the flats where I was traveling with speed. By the time I could react he hit me head on. I took most of the brunt to the shins. Suffice to say it didn't not hurt.

In my initial angered state, I picked up his bike and threw it out of the park while yelling at him to pay attention. One of the regulars decided to chime in and eventually told me to fuck off and that he would shoot me. Oh boy ... there I was, an ex-Marine, trying to have fun on a skateboard in my hometown where I had moved back to finish college. The one who threatened me was wearing a Slayer T-shirt. I thought to myself, "I saw Slayer in 1986, probably around the time your mom spit your dumb ass out. Plus, I have a lot of experience with guns, so if you care to challenge me, I could surely teach you a thing or two."

Luckily, I came to my senses and walked away from the incident while simultaneously biting my tongue to avoid further escalation of the argument. Who knows, maybe he would've taught ME something that would've landed me six feet under the dirt and him a long sentence in the state penitentiary, biting a pillow.

I still don't think bikers and skaters should share the same space at the same time when it comes to the parks. I don't dislike bikes, obviously, but in this case the two vehicles have a difficult time coexisting without conflict ... come to think of it, there's a theme here, as most groups can't seem to get along with others these days. Roadies hate fixed-gear hipsters and vice versa. Skaters hate rollerbladers. Motorists hate cyclists. Germa-phobes hate potlucks and buffets. Airline pilots hate stray geese. Christians hate homosexuals. Mormons hate everyone. As for me, I hate pennies. But I digress....

I came across the following video recently and it shines a light on what people are able to accomplish on a bike, outside of the parks. It is amazing how the street skate scene has influenced the BMX freestyle scene.

Can't we all just get, uh, move, along?


  1. Nice! Did I inspire your reflection on hating?

  2. Wilke? RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR, now I am bitter~!